Stilettos, Stoli & Scribbles ~ Served With A Twist

Good morning and Happy Halloween!

I sure do miss Halloween. I know it hasn’t gone anywhere. I mean the celebrations I can remember from my yout. My favorite costume was the Statue of Liberty. When I was seven, my mother made me a torch out of aluminum foil, red and yellow cellophane and a flashlight. She made me a crown and draped me just so in a sheet. (She also made me wear a parka underneath it, but we won’t talk about that.)  I even have fond memories of all of those mass-produced Ben Cooper costumes with the flimsy fabric and molded plastic masks that are considered death-traps now. How did we survive?

wearing this one in the next pic

the costume. Not sure where the mask went.

My step-monster, for all of her faults, threw great Halloween parties for the neighborhood kids, complete with games like donut-gobbling which consisted of donuts hung by strings across a pole

“blech uck dog germs!”

It is really a kid-centric holiday. Sure, I can go to an “adult” Halloween party – where 75% of the women will be dressed as something prefaced with the word “slutty”, as in “slutty nurse”, “slutty vampire” etc. You know what I mean – but it’s not the same.  There will be no bobbing for apples unless the tub is filled with vodka. These parties are an excuse to get sloppy drunk because, why not, you already look ridiculous. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that.)

“A person should always choose a costume which is in direct contrast to her own personality.” – Lucy van Pelt

I haven’t seen an honest-to-goodness, in-the-flesh trick-or-treater since the Wolf Man was a pup. I know this is a consequence of city life and apartment dwelling and that they are out there, all over this country and others. For many years, when I knew that there were some young children in my building, I’d make sure I had plenty of the “good” candy. I would distribute it evenly among the little paper treat bags which I would carefully arrange in the giant plastic cauldron to be at the ready near the door to my apartment.  Then I would sit and wait patiently for the sound of tiny fists banging on the door.

Pfffft. Nothin’. Not one single kid in all the years I’ve lived there. (I know I’m not alone in this. If any kid ever made it up to C.C.’s house, they would have deserved all the candy.)

These days, I try to resist buying the stuff that I will just end up giving to my coworkers on November 1^st. But it’s so difficult! Those giant, garbage bag-size sacks of “fun-size” treats just look, well, fun! A wave of nostalgia comes over me and the next thing I know I’m standing outside CVS loaded down with enough sugar to put the New England Patriots into a coma, wondering what the hell happened. At least I do my best to avoid temptation and only buy what I don’t like. (Okay, at least they aren’t all my favorites.)

Tonight, I will be plunked down in front of the tv watching “It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown” for the bazillionth time. I’ll have the giant bowl with me, too. But it will be filled with popcorn that I won’t even pretend to share.

But, of course, just like Linus waiting for the Great Pumpkin, if a trick-or-treater should knock on my door, I will be ready. My office, at least, will thank me.

How about you? What will you be doing this All – Hallows Eve? Any particularly fond memories of Halloweens past or traditions you want to share?